My Bloody Valentine


The main thing that upset me about the movie was that Jensen Ackles was acting like such a wuss! He is so not like that in Supernatural, so I like him a lot better as Dean on television than wussy guy in this movie. I did get over that, but it was just startling to me at first.

His character, Tom, is the son of a mine owner who was working in the mine when something went wrong and a bunch of people were trapped in the mine. While people were trying to free them, and the trapped people were struggling for air, one miner guy went crazy killing them all so he could get the last of the good air. While killer guy is recovering in the hospital in a coma, he wakes up and tears everyone apart in the hospital. Why? Is it because once you kill for survival, you suddenly become a serial killer, and not only kill people, but rip them in half and take one person’s heart out and put it in a Valentine’s box? Why yes, yes you do. Obviously.


Now, I can’t even remember what happened but the psycho was caught and trapped in the mine or everyone thought he was dead, so that led to teenagers partying in the abandoned mine shaft joking about how pscyho Harry Warden was going to get them, when he wasn’t really dead. Oops! There were dead kids everywhere and the 3D events finally started to happen. My favorite is still the first one with the eyeball coming right at me. Was it scary? No. Did I find it hilarious? Yes. That was one issue with the movie. I didn’t find it scary at all. I kept laughing at it, especially the things that were made 3D. Sometimes I was laughing while trying to figure out what body part was flying towards me. Was that a piece of a jaw? Why, yes it was! It was still entertaining, but not scary enough for me.

After not being able to save his girlfriend (another guy ended up saving her) and almost getting killed himself, Tom the wuss, feels bad for what happened so he just leaves town. He comes back 10 years later, only because his father has died and he plans to sell off the mine. That will kill the small town of nothing! We can’t let that happen. That’s the extent of the actual plot since by the time Tom shows up in town again, a lot of people start dying. Is it a coincidence? Is Tom the killer or is Harry back from the dead? Was he really dead before? I wasn’t sure anyone really cared, as long as killing kept happening. There was one point where there was a deep moment of conversation between Tom and his former girlfriend (who happened to marry the town sheriff who was the kid that saved her 10 years prior), but when the talking went on for too long, Stacy summed it up best with, “Blah blah blah. Quit talking and get back to killing!” Damn straight.

I cannot finish without discussing my favorite long scene in the movie. It wasn’t the 3D sex scene since I think they could have made that better. It was afterward. The girl finds out she has been videotaped and the guy has just left the hotel room. She is buck naked. She goes to her purse. Does she get her dress to put on to chase after him? Oh no! She gets a gun. We can only see her from the knees up at this point, but she opened the door to chase after him. I leaned over to Stacy and said, “I hope she is wearing nothing but high heels.” When she starts chasing him outside, what is she wearing? Nothing but heels! Classic! Then, when the scene inevitably turns into her being chased by Harry, she runs around forever naked. It was such a long scene where one actress just had no wardrobe to wear. Wow!

It might not have been the scariest movie or the best one, but the 3D amused me in funny ways and the crazy nakedness made it awesome.

Rating: B


Add a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.