Yes Paparazzi, You Are Annoying

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As we started watching the episode from October 2, 2015, we were petsitting two dogs. Timber, the King Charles Spaniel, was staring at the television waiting for it to start, while Frank, the bulldog, was snoring. I said he must not be a fan of the show. Amy said, “Frank can’t remember this many teams. He’ll jump in at a later leg.”

Then we picked the teams we thought would be leaving at the end of the episode. Amy picked the cheerleaders. I thought they would get their mojo back. Both Steve and I picked Chac Attack. Amy hoped we would be right since their name irritated her. Then during the credits, I forgot about the Reporters so I changed my pick to them. Steve changed his pick to the dancer guys. We also said we would not mind if the Chac Attack team left.

NO FRIENDS!

When the episode started, the Green Team finally had a chance to meet the other teams since they were separated most of the other leg from them. The girl said their goal that day was to start some friendships and possible form some small alliances. I was waiting for Amy to lose her shit. I said, “She’s there to make friends!” Amy said, ‘NO FRIENDS! OMG this girl. I am just so angry now.”

All the teams were headed to Buenos Aires, Argentina. They all ended up on the same flight so there was no airport drama llama or so we thought! Teams had to figure out what church the Pope was baptised in since that would be their next stop when they landed. Some asked to borrow people’s phone and laptops for the answer. The Southern team figured it out and told the Green Team who were sitting next to them. The guy on the Green Team announced that he would not share that information with anyone while the Southern Mom looked at him a bit confused. A few seconds later, the Texas guys asked the Southern Team the answer and were given it immediately. The paparazzi had come over to get it too. The Green Team noticed this and the guy got all annoyed saying, “So much for our agreement.” Teams looked at them a bit confused but this set off the Texas guys. They told the camera that they did not like the Green Team and were looking to take them out.

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Church = Crying

Teams arrived in Buenos Aires after 8:30 PM. They all jumped in cabs to get to the church, but it didn’t open until 7:30 AM. There were numbers for them to take to get in order. The Green Team and Paparazzi team arrived at the same time but the Green Team got number one. The Texas guys were right behind them. They were very annoyed when they learned that the Green Team were in first place. Oh, they hate them so much, but for what reason?!? Justin is a tad spazzy, but has he done anything to him besides have a big, goofy, crying head?

When the church opened in the morning, Justin talked about walking inside and they both teared up at the beauty. Amy said, “Shock face, you cried.”

How Much Cardboard Can There Be?

The clue given at the church was a detour between picking up cardboard or delivering a statue. Phil talked about how 10,000 people make a living by picking up cardboard around the city from the public recycling bins and Pope Francis praises their efforts to help the environment. Teams had to pick up 100 kilograms of cardboard on these carts and deliver them to a truck before getting their next clue. Amy immediately said “100 kilograms is 220 pounds.” I said, “I was wondering.” She replied, “There are 2.2 pounds in a kilogram.” I said, “You are full of useful info!” She said, “Thank you. 1.5 years living in a metric country.” Amy also wondered, “How much cardboard can there be?” I said, “Maybe they get a lot of Amazon packages.”

The other detour had teams picking up a statue at a shop, and while one team member sat in the front of a truck directing a driver where to go, the other one would be in the back bouncing around with the statue trying to keep it together. They had to deliver and set up the statue in a park and get their next clue from the park director. Amy decided the statue was creepy. I was laughing at the thought of the person bouncing around the back of the truck with the statue.

The Paparazzi team started fighting almost immediately. He said, “Want to pick the statue one?” She said, “I was thinking recycling, but whatever.” He said, “Let’s go get the statue,” while she made a completely passive aggressive face. When they were outside the church and read completely through the clue, he thought the recycling sounded easier and she had had enough! I was thinking he was agreeing with what she wanted to do in the first place, but she was not having it. He asked her what she wanted to do, but then started talking before she had a chance to answer. She did talk over him and said that she wanted to do one thing and he wanted to do the other and now they were fighting like they do every day. I said, “Honey, what do you want to do? I think we should do this before you answer.” Amy said, “I want to do whatever ends up making me feel like I was right and you were wrong, regardless of facts or actual events.” The fighting continued in the car when she told him, “I was talking to the taxi driver. No one needs you talking. Nobody!” Oh, they are a lovely couple!

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Every team but the reporters picks the cardboard. There were only eight carts available for the cardboard so it seemed like one team would have to switch tasks. The Green Team, Paparazzi Team, Texas guys, and Chac Attack arrived at the carts first and went off to gather some cardboard. The reporters arrived at the shop and picked up the statue to carry outside for the truck that was going to meet them there. Steve said, “Well, just grab the buttcrack!”

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The Green Team and the Texas guys were looking for the truck to deliver their cardboard around the same time. The Texas guys were very aggressive that they get in front of the Green Team. Justin told the Texas guys that they were both arrive to the place within 10 seconds of each other, but to go ahead of them. I’m sure this annoyed the Texas guys since everything Justin does annoys them. As they raced off, Justin said that the Texas guys might be ahead of them, but they did not look like they had 100 kilos worth of cardboard. Of course, the Green Team had what looked like a bunch of brand new cardboard that had just been placed in the recycling unit right before this task!

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The Southern team, Cheerleaders and Dancers were the next group of people to show up at the detours and take some carts. Then I am pretty sure the cheerleader that told everyone to be careful since it was slippery, then proceeded to fall on her butt. The Texas guys arrived at the truck and were told they only had 27 kilograms so they dumped off what they had and went off in search of more cardboard.

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Meanwhile, the reporters had their directions to the park to deliver the statue and the woman went in the front seat with the driver while the guy was in the back with the statue. They flashed the directions she was holding to the camera and Steve said, “Wait, did she have the handwriting of a second grader?” The truck was bouncing around and she was directing while the guy in the back could not see anything that was happening. He was still very supportive unlike the paparazzi couple. Amy said, “He has no idea where they are and he’s saying, ‘Great job, babe.’ I like him.” I was thinking that maybe I picked the wrong couple to go home. Paparazzi team should be my pick next week if they make it through this round.

The Green Team were moving a lot slower than the Texas guys since they had still not made it to the truck before the Texas guys picked up more cardboard. One of them said to the other to keep gathering up cardboard and he was going to slow down the Green Team. He got to the truck just before them but still didn’t have enough for 100 kilograms. The Green Team finally got to weigh their stuff and only had 60 kilograms so they both went out to get some more.

The Little Guys showed up to grab the last cart. The Track Stars were the last team to arrive and found all the carts gone. Instead of switching detours, the girls wanted to go find the truck and see if there were any carts there. The Green Team were talking about how much they still had to get to reach the limit. Amy said he was very narrative. The Texas guys had taken their third load to the truck and were still not done. The Southern team had found a bin with more suspicious looking brand new cardboard and were loading up as much as they could carry while the Cheerleaders were walking by saying they could not find any bins and had no cardboard yet. The Dancers found a bin that seemed to not have something pleasant inside of it while the Little Guys were shutting each other into bins.

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The Green Team finished the task first and only made two trips even though the Texas guys were trying so hard to get ahead of them, they kept making too many little trips to the truck to finish. It took them four times to get all the cardboard they needed. Justin told the Texas guys good luck, having no clue how much they hate him. The Texas guys ran across the Track Stars and told them where their cart was located, so I guess their plan did work on how to get a cart. They were still way behind everyone else though. Paparazzi finished in third place. Chac Attack thought they were done, but still still shy of the weight they needed. Amy said, “A doctor should be better at estimating the weight but probably has the nurses do that.”

The Reporters showed up at the park, but wasn’t sure where the clue was located. The park seemed huge, but they grabbed the statue and headed towards the gazebo, which is smart since that’s where they had to set it up. While they ran to the gazebo, the Southern team and Chac Attack finished the cardboard task. The Reporters finally finished their task while the Cheerleaders finished with the cardboard. The Dancers, Little Guys and Track Stars were the last teams to finish up the task. It did seem like the cardboard task went faster overall since the Reporters started working on their task in 4th place and finished up in 6th place and they couldn’t have done the task any quicker than they did.

What Is Happening?

The Green Team were the first ones to the next task, which was a road block where one team member had to learn to tango not only on the floor, but also be rigged up in some contraption so they could tango on the wall. As Amy said “Um, that seems really weird.” Diana decided to do it even though Justin said he’s a much better dancer. He thought they had enough of a lead that he wanted her to do it. The Texas guys were there next. Tanner decided to do it even though he has no idea why he chose to do it. Tanner thought the dance moves were hard and then he realized he had to also do it on the wall. He was freaking out a bit while the other guy was laughing at him. The Paparazzi team showed up third and Logan said she would do it.

Chac Attack showed up to the road block next when Green Team tried it for the first time and failed. The Reporters showed up as Texas guys were failing. The Southern Team arrived as the Paparazzi were trying. Logan was able to do the floor part, but lost her balance on the wall and failed. She got farther than the other teams.

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The Green Team was able to finish on the second try. Justin was talking about how she wasn’t nervous and doing so well. Amy wondered, “Does he narrate all his life?” I said that he probably does. Tanner said hearing Justin scream when Diana finished was the worst thing since he can’t stand him. Why do you hate him so much? Maybe he hates constant narration. Amy said, “Calm down, sir.” The Green Team was leaving when the Cheerleaders showed up. Justin told them it was a dancing challenge and they got so excited! Texas tried and failed again. The Paparazzi team was successful on the second try. The guy yelled as much as Justin did, but Tanner did not vent his rage at that team like he did the Green Team.

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The Paparazzi team was leaving as the Dancers and Little Guys showed up at the road block. Amazingly the Texas guys got it on their fourth try right after Chac Attack failed. Chac Attack did get it on the second try. The Cheerleader Krista knows a lot of different dance styles, but hadn’t done the tango before and found it a bit challenging. She couldn’t imagine it for the other teams that didn’t have a dancing background. The Little Guy that was doing it was struggling with his fear of heights when he was hanging sideways off the wall. He was terrified especially when he slipped once and was hanging upside down on the harness. He said he had to take a break.

The Track Stars were showing up to the Road Block in last place as the Southern Team were leaving. The son did the task in one try. Steve said, “She had no idea he was gay before he came out. No idea.” Southern mom was so proud of her son for doing the dance moves that she yelled that he came out of her belly. Amy said, “No one needs that reminder, lady. You’re not cute like the otter mom.” Steve said “Hold on. No one needs to hear your biology.”

The Cheerleaders got it on the first try. Krista was having so much fun dancing. Amy was very concerned for the accordion player that played for each team. She said, “I wonder if they have another accordion player in case this guy gets a hand cramp.” The Reporters finished just after the Cheerleaders on their second try. That left the Dancers, Little Guys and Track Stars at the road block.

The Dancers finished just before the Little Guys finally figured out the dance moves. They were both struggling to find a taxi that knew where the Polo Field was located. The Track Stars finished up while the other teams were still finding a cab so it was close for all last teams. The girl that did the dance said she had to put her shoes on and her friend told her no, they had to go. She was running barefoot complaining about her feet while her friend told her she would buy her new feet.  I recalled that one season where a girl stopped to pee and ended up eliminated so I could understand the need to keep moving. They all seemed to find taxis around the same time.

Texas Hatred for Justin

As teams were headed to the pit stop, the Texas guys were not happy with the Green Team being in the lead. Josh told Tanner that Justin was talking smack about the other teams. The only things we were shown on the screen was Justin being very proud of Diana and that was it. Tanner said they needed to turn all the other teams against them and take them down.

The Green Team were the first ones to get to the Pit Stop. Amy said, “If he cries, I’m slapping everyone.” Steve said, “He’s going to cry.” But he didn’t cry! She did! They won a trip to Morocco.

The Paparazzi team got to the pit stop area but were having trouble finding the entrance. The Texas guys got out of their cab and could not believe that the Southern Team got there right before them. The Texas guys were having trouble finding a cab that knew where they were going so I don’t know why they were alarmed that another team passed them. The Texas guys freaked out and started running towards the mat, which was a long way from the entrance. They passed the Paparazzi team and the Southern team, but Tanner managed to pull his hamstring as they raced towards the mat. I have no idea why he was running so fast. They knew that the Green Team was way ahead of them. As soon as he said he pulled his hamstring, Amy said, “We’ve got a piper down!” I am thinking it was karma for all the Justin hatred from earlier.

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He said he thought they might have been in first place, but he regretted injuring his leg for second place. Why did you think it was for first place?  Amy wondered if it would be a season-ending injury. The Texas guys came in second with Southern Team and Paparazzi in third and fourth place. Chac Attack ended up coming in fifth place in the pit stop. The Cheerleaders were in sixth place and one of them also danced with the sassy mat greeter guy next to Phil. The Reporters checked in right behind them.

Somehow, the Track Stars came in eighth place so that left the Dancers and Little Guys for the last two spots. We liked both of those teams so we were going to be sad either way. The Dancers did come in ninth place after Phil made them cry thinking they might be in last place. Amy said, “This is possibly the most crying season ever.” That meant the Little Guys came in last place and were eliminated. The Little Guys said that they only lasted two legs. Steve said, “They were two kind of short legs.” Amy said, “Steve!”

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