TAR: Team S&M

Amazing Race
Do You Like American Candy?

Sometimes my first impressions change after the second episode. There are some people that I didn’t find annoying, but now can’t stand. There are some people that I thought were annoying, but grew on me a bit. Nothing has changed so far. I still do not like separated couple, Ken and Tina, and I don’t like Team Emo–Terence and Sarah. I think I’d be sad if Team Emo left though because they are entertaining to write about. I just don’t want them to win. While watching this episode, I was pondering a better name for Ken & Tina instead of separated couple. Since she loves to beat down on her cheating man and he just takes it since he was bad, they are now Team S&M.

The teams started out in Brazil on a floating fortress. While resting for 12 hours before they have to go on the next leg, Team Emo was getting all upset over nothing! Don’t be shocked. Mr. Emo was complaining that Ms. Emo was talking to other teams. How can she pay attention to him all day and night if she is interacting with other people? Why doesn’t she understand! He pouted and ran off while she cried in confusion.

The order the teams left the pit stop:

  1. Nick & Starr (siblings) – 4:07 am
  2. Ken & Tin (Team S&M) – 4:13 am
  3. Terence & Sarah (Team Emo) – 4:18 am
  4. Mark & Bill (gamers) – 4:24 am
  5. Kelly & Christy (divorced ladies ) – 4:44 am
  6. Toni & Dallas (mom/son) – 4:57 am
  7. Andrew & Dan (ASU frat guys) – 5:03 am
  8. Aja & Ty (long-distance dating) – 5:05 am
  9. Anthony & Stephanie (dating) – 5:11 am
  10. Marisa & Brooke (blondes) – 5:13 am

Clue: The teams had to fly over 600 miles to Fortaleza, Brazil. Once there, they had to take a taxi to a tiny village of Cumbuco and find Plaza do Cumbuco for their next clue.

When the siblings took off, Starr was freaking out about the cab driver’s driving. When Ken & Tina were in the cab, she kept asking the driver if he had a cell phone she could use. He kept saying no, but she kept asking. I guess she thought the answer would magically change or he would produce a cell phone out of his butt. When Team Emo left, there was immediate drama! Mr. Emo hit his head on the trunk lid when the cab driver was trying to shut it. Then he whined that Ms. Emo couldn’t see his head bleeding. Oh the agony!

Airport Fun Times

The siblings and Team S&M arrived at the airport first, but found the earliest flight wasn’t leaving until 11:30 am. That was unacceptable to Tina so they went running off elsewhere. At that time, the divorced ladies were getting their clue. They found one airline that had a 6:45 am flight, but only one seat was left. They put their name on the list and started begging. Team Emo arrived at the airport and were standing right behind them. The counter lady saw how many people were looking for the flight and made a call. The airline switched to a bigger plane. Tina believed this was all her doing and went around telling everyone to thank her for getting the plane switched. Yes, honey, it was all you.  While Team Emo was getting their tickets, they commented that the siblings and Team S&M had an alliance. Mr. Emo said it wasn’t two teams, but one team. Okay, but I’m not sure what advantage it was since everyone benefited from the bigger plane. Then Ms. Emo added that the two teams didn’t even say hi to her. Boo hoo!

The gamers arrived and got their tickets as the mom/son team were taking off from the pit stop. Tina wanted to make sure she was first. The counter lady informed her the seats were all open, but they could get on first. The ASU guys were leaving the pit stop around that time, followed shortly by Aja & Ty who need a team name. Aja was concerned her taxi driver ran every ran every red light they hit. The divorced ladies arrived at the airport while Team Emo and gamers headed to the gate. Team S&M and the siblings went to exchange their money since they knew they could get on the plane first and didn’t have to wait in line. Anthony & Stephanie (another team that needs a team name) were finally leaving the pit stop, followed by the blondes who were in last place. Anthony & Stephanie picked a cab that looked like it was having car trouble since Anthony loves beater cars. Do you want to do that during a race?

While the divorced ladies were getting their tickets, Tina showed up out of nowhere to inform them that she got them to switch planes. Where did you come from? The divorced ladies were not amused. Mom/Son were buying their tickets along with frat boys. Aja & Ty wanted to exchange their money first before getting tickets. Guess who was there? It was Tina informing them not to worry since she had them switch to a bigger plane. She told them that they owed her. Oh my god, go away! Anthony & Stephanie and the blondes finally arrived and bought their tickets.

Everyone was on the same flight and it seemed like there would be no drama, but wait! There was still standing in line drama to be had! Team S&M informed everyone that they bought their tickets first so they would be getting on the plane first. Team Emo and the gamers, who had been waiting in line, rather than wandering around telling everyone how awesome they were, didn’t agree with this logic. Mr. Emo and Mr. Masachist were about to throw down until Mr. Emo backed down and apologized. Then everyone got on the plane and it didn’t matter.

Cumbuco, Brazil

Like usual, it didn’t matter who got on the plane first, since Team S&M were not the first ones running out of the plane. It was the gamers followed by the siblings. They were looking for cabs except they all ran the wrong way. They went to the arrivals areas. Every single team. Oh boy. Then they realized their error and found the exit. It ended up with Team Emo getting a cab first, followed by the divorced ladies, the ASU guys and the mom/son team. The ASU guys said they were glad they were in the back so when the front realized they were in the wrong place, they quickly changed their course and found the cabs. Aja & Ty were beating themselves up over following everyone else to the wrong location inside the airport. Anthony & Stephanie were trying to get a stalled cab started by helping the driver push it. What is up with him and wanting to take broken down cars? It is just stupid. The blondes took off past Anthony & Stephanie until she finally convinced him to switch cabs. The gamers were getting into a cab around that time too. The siblings and Team S&M were one of the last teams to get into cabs. It was a little instant karma for cutting in line! Team Emo arrived first at the plaza for their clue with divorced ladies and mom/son team close behind. The ASU guys were in the slowest cab still driving somewhere.

Clue: The teams must take a dune buggy and drive it to Barraca D Manoel and find a vendor that will have their next clue.

Aja & Ty got out of their cab, but they were not near the clue box. I’m not sure where they were. They were looking around when the gamers and the blondes got the clue. Team Emo got into their dune buggy and had a blast cruising down the beach. Aja & Ty finally found the dune buggies when the gamers and blondes were getting into dune buggies. The ASU guys finally got the plaza too, but couldn’t find the clue box. Anthony & Stephanie were driving through very poor areas and amazed at how people lived. They were more grateful for what they had back home.  ASU guys were still looking for the clue box while the siblings and Team S&M found it. Ty was yelling on the beach, but I don’t know why. He was at the dune buggy. Why was he not in it? Did they have to wait for the drivers to get back before leaving? I might have missed that part, but he was angry. The ASU guys showed up asking everyone where they got their clue. The blondes said it was back where they came from. They went off to look for it. The blondes, siblings and Team S&M took off. Why was Ty so mad? The blondes waved at some guys on the beach and got mooned in the process! The ASU guys finally found the clue box and Ty was still yelling when he found it too. Oh, he hadn’t found the clue box yet? Oh boy! Well, they were ahead of Anthony & Stephanie who still got the clue last.

The teams finally arrived at Barraca D Manoel to get the next clue, which was a detour.

Detour: In Beach It, they had to go over to these little boats and move it across the sand with logs pushed underneath it until they reached an inlet of water. In Docket, the teams had to go to a port and scan many pages in a computer database for a series of numbers in their clue.  When they find the number, it’ll give a location where they can go find the container in the ship yard. The clue will be inside the correct container.

Team Emo, the divorced ladies and mom/son team decide to go with Beach It. The gamers arrived next and went to Docket. The divorced ladies were very quick at it. The gamers had arrived at the port and started scanning the database. The siblings decided to Beach It. The blondes wanted to Docket since the boats would have been too strenous for them. They told the dune buggy guy to follow the siblings, even though they weren’t going to the same place. What? Tina really did not want to do Beach It, but told Ken she would do it.  The ASU guys decided to Beach It since it was a guy task. Huh? Aja & Ty also went with the beach one. The siblings arrived at the beach and the blondes were close behind. One blonde read the clue that said “Find the computer” yet there was no computer around….on the beach! They FINALLY realized they were at the wrong detour and decided to just do it since they were there. Oh my god, the brains on those two. The gamers finally found the number and got a location for the container. They went off to look for the container.

Back on the beach, the divorced ladies were working on moving the boat, but Team Emo was getting ahead of them. Ms. Emo said she was getting tired and Mr. Emo yelled at her for doing push ups in the morning and it made her tired. Divorced ladies did not like his yelling since it reminded them of their abusive relationships they both had before. The siblings were cruising past everyone. The blondes were struggling, but keeping up with the others. The gamers finally got to the containers and were amazed at how many there were in the ship yard. They started walking around when Anthony & Stephanie finally got the detour and picked Beach It. The ASU guys and Aja & Ty got to the beach. One ASU guy jumped on the boat asking if they got on. The other one asked him what he was doing before they actually started doing what the clue said. Team Emo finished up the detour first and got the next clue.

Clue: Teams had to find the nearby taxis and travel to Parque De Vaquejada to find the next clue.

Team Emo had no idea where to get a taxi. Mr. Emo suggested running straight down the beach where all the boats were located or run up the hill. Mr. Emo didn’t want to go up the hill so he said it would be a further run, but no hill. That’s the way they went. Bad move! The siblings were second to finish. As soon as they read the clue, they looked up and saw an orange and red arrow marker directing them up the hill to the taxi stand. Oh, Team Emo, why so blind? The divored ladies finished up in third place, but then they were asking where the unmarked container would be. They were reading the clue for the other detour.  The gamers did find their container and the clue around the time the divorced ladies were digging in the sand randomly searching for a container. Oh, I love it when teams are dumb!


Team Emo was still searching for a taxi when the gamers and siblings were getting a taxi to head to the next clue. Team Emo found a little village where there was no taxi to be found. Mom/Son team and Team S&M finished up and the divorced ladies were wondering where their containers were, but they kept digging. Team Emo were opening up the back doors to random cars asking if they were a taxi. They were both frustrated that they couldn’t find a taxi and Mr. Emo thought they should stop and get an ice cream. He wasn’t joking around. He was serious. Team S&M were the next team to get into a taxi followed by the mom/son team. Team Emo finally saw a taxi, but it went right by them since it was the gamers. They noticed a team already in the taxi. Another team went by with Team S&M. Ken said to keep driving and not stop for them. Tina wanted to stop since she said they might need help, but they won’t want to help them now. Oh, I think she took care of that already when she cut in front of everyone in line. Mom/Son team drove by and told the cab driver to stop to help Team Emo. Mr. Emo asked where they got the cabs. Do you think it is from the direction everyone has been coming from? He said, it was back near the beach. Ms. Emo clarified it was straight up the hill, which was the choice they did not make.

Back at the boats, the frat boys finished up in 5th place with Aja & Ty passing the blondes who were super tired and flushed. The divorced ladies finally decided to give up their digging and head to the taxi after the ASU guys. Aja & Ty finished and got into a cab after the divorced ladies. While in the cab, the divorced ladies finally reread the clue and realized they were mixing up the two detours. They vowed to always read their clues more carefully. Team Emo was still running back up the hill to the taxi stand as the frat boys, divorced ladies, and AJa & Ty all passed them. The blondes finally pushed the boat into the water when Team Emo got to the taxi stand. The blondes were so impressed that they did the physical activity. They were very sore but felt good with what they accomplished. Oh no! Team Emo isn’t at the taxi stand yet. I thought they were, but they were still running up the hill to it. It appears the blondes got into a cab before them. Anthony & Stephanie finally got their boat into the water and started to head up the hill to the taxi stand. Team Emo finally got into a cab just before the last team. They commented they were stupid and a few teams passed them. Oh, you mean all but one passed you?

Parque De Vaquejada

The gamers arrived at the road block first and followed their clue that told them to ask the cab driver to wait.

Roadblock: Only one team member can perform a roadblock. The team member had to find a clue in plain sight. They picked who would do it based on that description alone. There was a long wall with a lot of advertisements and places listed. The team member had to figure out their next destination from what was written on the wall. They would need to go over to the guy holding the clue and guess. If they guessed correctly, they would get it and take off.

Team members that did the road block:

  • Bill
  • Tina
  • Toni
  • Andrew
  • Nick
  • Aja
  • Christy
  • Marisa
  • Sarah
  • Anthony

Bill was starting to overthink the wall and think if there was a pattern to the names. He ended up writing down all the names on the wall so he could list them off the clue guy. Tina had arrived and saw what he was doing. She decided to copy him. The siblings had a cab driver that was lost. Starr was freaking out and Nick told her to calm down. Mom/Son arrived ahead of the siblings who finally got directions for their lost cab driver. Bill listed off all names to the clue guy until he got to the right one. The frat guys had arrived around the same time. The gamers were off to the pit stop.

Pit Stop

The pit stop was Cidada Da Crianca, which was a park built as an oasis for the city’s children.  Soon after the gamers got the clue, Tina was reading off all the names and said the right one. She squealed, which caused Toni who was down the line to mutter, “Oh god.” While driving, Team S&M passed the gamers. At a stop light, the gamers begged Team S&M to let the “fat guys have one,” but they weren’t going for it. The gamers laughed at their luck of being in a foot race against an ex-professional football player.

Back at the roadblock, the siblings arrived to it in 5th place. While driving to the road block, the divorced ladies were chanting that they had learned to read the clue. They were passed by Aja & Ty. They both arrived at the same time. Aja told her taxi driver to wait. The divorced ladies let their driver take off, since they didn’t read the clue. You can’t make this stuff up! Right after getting to the clue box, the divorced ladies realized they needed to make their taxi wait for them. It was already gone!

Over at the pit stop, the gamers and Team S&M were getting out of their cabs and racing to the mat. Team S&M made it in first place. They both won an off road vehicle. The gamers came in soon after them. Phil asked Team S&M why the race was important to them. Ken said they were trying to put their marriage back together. The gamers said if coming in first helped them do that, even just a little bit, then the gamers didn’t need ATVs.

Back at the roadblock, the blondes arrived, followed closely by Team Emo. Just before Ms. Emo was about to start the roadblock, Mr. Emo wanted her to calm down and kiss him. She just wanted to catch up since they were behind. Most of the teams were still there at the roadblock though.  Anthony & Stephanie finally arrived at the roadblock. Andrew was saying to someone that he should just write down all the names and list them off to the guy. Aja was already doing that. Nick was trying to get people to work together with him, which meant, he wanted other people to figure it out and he would take the answer. He first tried to get his arch nemesis, Ms. Emo to help him, but he didn’t know she hates him so she just started rambling nonsense. He gave up and ran over to frat boy, saying he thought it was a color coding thing. Christy was reading off all the names to the clue guy and got it right. Good thing the divorced ladies finished so soon, since they didn’t have a taxi to take them anywhere! They had to find one and it seemed like they were in the middle of nowhere, hence the clue saying to make sure their taxis stayed there. Of course, they could have one of the other taxis call to get another one out there. I’m not sure why it was taking some teams so long to finish, but I guess they were overthinking it, looking for a clue instead of listing off all the name places on the wall.

Toni finally started writing names down and ran to the clue guy. Nick was saying to frat guy that he didn’t think you could just jot all the names down and rattle them off. The divorced ladies were still looking for a taxi. Aja was reading off her list to the clue guy and they were off in fourth place. Ms. Emo was right next to her so she could just repeat the same clue so Team Emo was in fifth place. Toni was right next to her so mom/son were in sixth place. The divorced ladies were still looking for a taxi. Starr was frustrated with her brother about how they were second out of the detour, but stuck at the road block. Stephanie was yelling at Anthony to write stuff down. Marisa was complaining that she didn’t know Spanish. Stephanie was telling Anthony to write down any phrases and just try. He said he was looking at a bunch of pig latin. Nice! Blonde said she thought it was on the wall. Yes, the entire road block was on the wall. After all that time, Andrew came to check with one phrase and was stunned when it was wrong. Dan said other people were saying much longer stuff than that.

Team Emo, Aja & Ty and mom/son got out of their taxis at the pit stop at the same time, but were trying to find the entrance. There was much running around. They all got to the mat at the same time.

Guess what? Divorced ladies were still looking for a taxi back at the road block! Nick and Andrew were still stumped at the big mystery of the road block wall. Nick told Andrew if he figured it out, he would share it with him. He was writing down names finally while Andrew just stood there looking confused. Nick read off the names and got the clue. Did he tell Andrew? Nope! He just ran off. He said he didn’t mind playing dirty as long as he benefits from it. The siblings took off. Then the divorced ladies found their original cab hiding somewhere and finally were on their way! The blonde was wondering aloud if she just read off all the names, if that would do it. Anthony heard that and acted like that wouldn’t work. Andrew finally read off all the names and got the clue. Marisa finally did the same thing. Anthony finally, finally, finally wrote the names down too and got the clue.

The siblings were next to arrive at the pit stop. The divorced ladies were the seventh to arrive and were surprised they dropped to seventh. They would have been third if they had read their clue. The frat guys and blondes arrived at the same time, but couldn’t find the entrance. Anthony & Stephanie were not far behind. They were all running around trying to find the way into the pit stop. It finally ended up with the frat boys and blondes at the same time, which left Anthony & Stephanie in last place. They were eliminated from the race.

Final standings:

  1. Ken & Tina – Team S&M
  2. Mark & Bill – Gamers
  3. Terence & Sarah – Team Emo
  4. Aja & Ty – long-distance dating
  5. Toni & Dallas – mom/son
  6. Nick & Starr – siblings
  7. Kelly & Christy – divorced ladies
  8. Andrew & Dan – frat guys
  9. Marisa & Brooke – blondes
  10. Anthony & Stephanie – dating

The moral of the story is that the teams that do not have a name get to leave since I don’t know what to call them. That means that Aja & Ty better do something to give them a name or they might be gone next!

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